You may have noticed that I like to post a quote each day, and that they tie into the theme I am writing out that day. You may be asking yourself why I do that, so I thought I would fill you in…
I have talked a little about why I started this blog and what it has meant to me, but there’s definitely more to it than I have have spilled the beans on already. For example, when I write a blog post, the reason I do it is because it is something that resonates with me that day and I feel that by sharing what thoughts I have that it might also help someone else as well. I have found that when I have thoughts about something, when I am feeling a certain way, it really helps me to focus on handling it rather than avoiding it. It is pretty much the story of my life and it is definitely worked for me to come at something “head on”. I choose quotes that serve as motivation for me, and they help me focus on overcoming whatever I am going through at that time…or at least serve as a reminder of what I need to do.
We all have storms in our lives, and I am definitely no exception. I really need to remind myself constantly to be strong, to weather the storms, to feel grateful, to be patient, to remember why I am here and so much more. So when I post something about gratitude for example, it’s because on that day I realize that I need to focus on gratitude rather than the fact that something might not be working out for me!
I have found that my mindset is absolutely what controls my outcome. When I feel positive I am much more likely to achieve what I am striving for, or at the very least, be OK with whatever comes my way. Do you ever wonder why when something bad happens that more bad seems to show up as well? I have seen it time and time again in my life, and being lucky enough to be married to a mindset coach, I have learned that focus is absolutely what needs to change if we want results to change.
Now don’t get me wrong, just changing how you think isn’t going to change everything in your life, action is still required, but positive action starts with positive thoughts.
Do you have habits that you wish you didn’t have? The best news about habits is that they can be changed at any time in your life…and just as they were started, habits can only be changed by repetition of what you want to replace your old habit with. For example, if you want to change the way you eat (kind of like the post I wrote on Friday), then you have to create new habits that embody the way you want to eat in the future. Think about why you want to change, what it means to you, what it would mean if you didn’t do it and how it could affect anyone else around you. Once you reach the point of pain where it hurts too much to continue the old habit, that’s when you will be motivated enough to change.
The key to changing those old habits, because positive thinking is not all that’s needed like I said, is to realize that there is a COST associated with not changing. I have had many times in my life where old habits are stopping me from getting where I want to be in relationships and in business. Here’s one of my habits that I have had to change to make my relationship with Brandon excellent: I have always been someone that is not big on talking about my feelings in a relationship, I have never been a big talker and I always felt like because Brandon wanted to talk about EVERYTHING that it meant there was something wrong and I was being told that I was doing something wrong. You see, Brandon (and actually 2 of my kids) are people that need to problem solve by talking things through, and I am a person that internalizes what I am going through and just handles it on my own 99% of the time. As you can imagine, me not being a talker and having a husband that needs that could cause huge problems in our relationship. For many years I fought it, I thought “why should I have to be the one to change?” “This is just the way I am”, but eventually I realized that I wouldn’t actually be giving something up to give Brandon and my kids this gift. I started to open up more, to talk things through and learn how to not “own” whatever it was they were going through and to not try to fix it.
Once I started creating a space where I was open, the conversations became easier, and now (not that I still get it right all the time) but I am definitely on the road to making this my normal behavior rather than just shutting down. It wasn’t until I realized that the cost to NOT do it was higher than it was to DO it, that’s when I was able to change my habit. It was worth it to me to be there for Brandon and my kids, and guess what I found out, it actually wasn’t just who I was, and I started to be able to feel empathy and just listen – something that was hard before because I very often could see something and want to just fix it.
Whatever you have going on in your life, I hope that you will find at least a little motivation from my posts and quotes…and if there’s a topic you would especially love to see – i’m all ears!!