I came across this quote and fell in love with it…how often are we given the chance to be that person for someone else that can be an inspiration, an example, a role model or just a friend? I have always loved the idea of being there for others, in fact when I was younger my Grandparents gave me a book that was a “birthday” book, that had a different quote for each day of the year. Then meaning was that the quote on your day said something about you…
Mine said “If you need me, call…I will always answer.” I don’t know if it was at that point that I started taking my relationships seriously or I had already innately known that before, but it was something that certainly rang true for me. I have always felt that we owe it to others, and ourselves, to give everything to our relationships. If you ask anyone that knows me they’ll tell you that I am a fiercely loyal friend, and I will do anything for those that I love.
Life is definitely not meant to be spent alone, and the only way we will ever ensure that we have others in our lives is if we make sure that we are working on our relationships every day. I can tell you that my biggest challenge so far in this life is raising kids (particularly teenagers), in fact I think it’s kind of like a white knuckle rollercoaster, where you know you’re going to survive but somehow your hair is going to be messed up, your head will be rattled around and you’re most definitely going to end up with a killer headache. So those are probably the relationships that are going to require the most effort.
This Thanksgiving weekend our whole family, along with my parents, came up to our house in Midway (a small town about 45 minutes away from our home), to spend some quality time. Thanksgiving day went pretty smoothly, which is great because being cooped in a house and not getting along is pretty painful. Yesterday was a different story however, there was a fight surrounding playing the Xbox that belongs to one of the boys, that ended up in a real fight, lots of shouting and eventually Brandon having to work his coaching magic on the boys to get them to calm down. Fortunately there was no bloodshed, and we managed to come together again long enough to make it to watch “Creed” as a family last night.
I have never been so emotionally exhausted as when my kids get into a fight with each other, or when I end up in a fight with one of them. It’s way more draining than any physical exertion, and it feels a lot worse. What this weekend has taught me a little is that we are not only responsible for our own energy but also the effect that energy has on others. It’s a big responsibility to know that I can affect other’s feelings, but I can tell you, if I want my house to run smoothly, I have to make sure that I am balanced, not neglecting my own needs which makes me cranky, and I am definitely not pretending to be OK when I’m not.
I know I am not going to be OK all the time, so I have been known to put myself in “time out” to recharge, and make myself feel better. Energy is such a powerful thing, there is no way to fake it, so when we are feeling negative or frustrated even if we think other people are not aware, chances are that our energy is giving us away regardless of what our words say.
Being conscious of our feelings is the first thing we need to do to be able to share the best of ourselves with others. We are definitely never going to be perfect, but by noticing how we are feeling, being in touch with that so we can act consciously, that will allow us to have a greater influence with anyone we interact with. Knowing what I know now about raising teenagers and adult children, I know that there are definitely times when I have to check myself to make sure I am not influencing their feelings or behavior in a negative way.
My favorite color, the one that defines me the most accurately is Red which means excitement, love, strength, energy and passion. When I wear Red I feel a lot of those things…
My goal in my life is to share my “color” and help as many people as possible! Who would you most like to share your color with?