Dressing up your Jeans

Can you remember who you were before the world told you who you should be?

This may not be as big a deal to some of you as it is to me…
For 20 years I have worked for companies that only allowed us to wear jeans as sales people on Fridays (and after a while, not at all!). Since I left last October I’m not going to lie I have actually had fun experimenting with my jeans, and guess what I found out – looking good AND professional and that “put together” doesn’t need to exclude jeans.

I realize that I’m not talking about anything ground breaking here, but it has actually been really freeing for me to be able to dress exactly how I want, because I am mature enough to figure out how to dress appropriately for what I am doing and who I am going to be seeing.

Dressing for your audience is a huge deal – knowing what kind of a person they are, and making the right impression is important. I have always found that it’s better to err on the side of being over-dressed rather than being under-dressed! But jeans aren’t necessarily under-dressed, unless of course the person you will be meeting with is an ultra conservative person that never dresses down 😉

Skinny jeans can be really dressed up with a gorgeous sweater during these winter months and wide legged, high waisted jeans are one of my current favorites. They almost feel like you’re not wearing jeans at all. I added a fur jacket, high boots, big hoop earrings and voila…sass in jeans 😉 .

I have found that when I am happy in what I am wearing, it affects my mood for the whole day. I have learned to notice things that make me feel good, and I steer myself toward those things (whether it is who you hang out with, what you wear, the makeup you put on, you hair etc. they are all equally important if they make you feel good).

I have a challenge for you all…what if you came up with one style or piece of clothing that makes you feel good, and find ways to adapt it to make it UNIQUELY YOUR STYLE!

See how it makes you feel…
See if it affects your mood and ultimately your reaction to the day’s events…
See if it changes the results you get on that day…

I have found that the more conscious I am of myself, my surroundings, my feelings and my behavior the easier it is for me to not react or let things really get me down. When we’re not completely conscious that’s when we are in reaction mode, and I can tell you that’s not where I want to be because it causes me to react hastily and very often with anger.

Are you willing to take on this challenge?
I would love to hear your results…

You can shop my look & some similar styles by clicking the links below

Color is Important

Why live as one single color of crayon when you can live as the whole box and color the whole world!

When we pick out the clothes we are going to wear finding a color we like is not enough. Knowing that certain colors suit you more than others is something to keep in your back pocket when shopping and putting together an outfit.

There are a lot of things that play into whether a color suits you or not…such as: skin tone, hair color, eye color, attitude (yes, I said attitude – if you are sassy and confident you are much more likely to feel comfortable in a bold, bright red than if you are shy and withdrawn), and even our mood. Of course we are always drawn to colors we love, and I am definitely no exception. When I find a style in a color that I love, I always hold it up against my face before I even try it on to see what it makes me feel like. On a good day I am pretty certain that I love it and that it will look good on me, but on a bad day (a day when I am not sure of my emotions, how I am feeling or if something else is affecting me), that’s when I seek an outside opinion.

There are definitely times of the year that some colors are more available than others…for example this mustard colored sweater. Mustard is a color that is very often associated with fall or autumn, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be worn at other times. In fact, I kind of love wearing colors that you don’t see a lot of people wearing at certain times of the year. Because the color of my sweater is not as prevalent during winter months, that’s when I am choosing to wear it – you know the whole “standing out” thing 😉

Going back to colors being more readily available at certain times of the year, you can guarantee that each season fashions are going to be put out in certain colors that they have picked for some reason. But here’s the important thing to remember…just because a color is “in style” doesn’t mean you have to wear it. If your skin tone works really well with a cool red but the season’s color is an orange red, that doesn’t mean that you suddenly have to start wearing it. I believe that the season’s styles, colors and textures are just a guideline – they are only there to enhance what we already know we want to wear.

For those of you out there that only love to wear black or grey, go on and express yourself. The only caveat I would offer is that sometimes dark colors like black and grey can make you look pale and withdrawn. If you feel most comfortable in those colors because that’s your style, I get it. For those of you that do it because you are afraid to express yourself or you aren’t sure what other colors might suit you – then I would recommend stepping out of your comfort zone and trying a new color each week. Who knows, you might actually find that you love color!

Remember, our confidence grows when we are not afraid to step outside our comfort zone and try something new!

Shop some of my top color picks by clicking the links below…

I Believe in Superheroes

Weakness is a Superpower in Disguise!

I have always loved the superhero movies – maybe because I grew up in a home with only brothers and now I only have sons. Nevertheless, when a new movie comes out I am the first to want to be there, and I absolutely love them!

With all of that being said, I do believe that the world actually has REAL superheroes. I don’t believe in them in the same way that Superman can fly or Aquaman (oh boy! Aquaman…) can actually survive underwater, but more in the sense that we all have our own super powers should we choose to use them.

Shop my look by clicking the links at the bottom of this post…

Our family went to watch “Glass” earlier this week, and for those of you that have seen that or seen “Unbreakable” or “Split” you may get where I am going with this. I don’t want to be the one to ruin this movie for you just in case you haven’t seen it, but just know that in the movie things you would not expect to be superpowers or strengths actually are what make the characters super-human. I really enjoyed the movie and would definitely recommend it. Unbreakable was the prequel to this movie and released in 2000. In that movie Bruce Willis’s character was the sole survivor of a train wreck and it was at that point after he had experienced such trauma that he realized what his superpower was.

After I watched it I started contemplating how if in the movie (and yes, I do know that it was not based on fact), if it was possible to have strengths or superpowers, then why not in real life? I have always believed that our talents or strengths are actually our superpowers. We are not all good at the same things, and that is what makes us stronger and more unique.

The quote I posted at the top of this blog is one that really resonated with me, because if we consider our weaknesses and how they can stop us from reaching our full potential, how amazing would it be if we converted those weaknesses into our strengths?

So, if we consider our weaknesses and how we can turn them into our strengths, what is the one that you really want to be your superpower? I would love to say that I am going to turn the fact that I am not the fastest runner into me being The Flash, but in the real world, that will never happen. So, I am going to focus on those things I know can make me stronger, more confident, resilient and happy!

For now – I consider my superpowers to be: I believe I can do anything if I put my mind to it, confidence, empathy, and inner strength. What are yours?

Real Not Perfect

Shop my look & similar by clicking the links at the bottom of the post

To be worthy doesn’t mean having to be perfect!

Perfection is something that is one of those unattainable goals that we somehow seem to be striving for, always in vain. We set expectations on ourselves and set ourselves up for failure when our goal or expectation is to become perfect.

It is easy to get caught up in wanting ourselves to be perfect, but it is also very dangerous because when we are wanting that perfection it very often doesn’t stop at ourselves and we come to want or even expect that from others around us as well!

In previous posts I’ve talked a little about how comparison of ourselves to others is fatal, and in this age of social media, it’s really hard to not allow ourselves to succumb to such self-sabotaging behavior. So how do we change our mindset so that striving for personal excellence is what we aim for? Here are some things that I use daily and they work for me:

  1. Choose to focus only on being better each day than the day before – rather than focusing on what we’re doing wrong or we’re not great at.
  2. Choose to appreciate and love the things we are good at and build on those…
  3. Practice positive self-talk so that we can start to realize how amazing we are.
  4. Allow ourselves to celebrate any victory, whether great or small. That way we are not always dissatisfied with our results. We have to appreciate the small things first otherwise we won’t know what the big things are!
  5. Don’t just focus on the outcome – a lot of growth and strength building comes in the journey. In the learning – you know, the falling down and getting up!
  6. Sometimes procrastination comes from not wanting to not be able to complete something or do it perfectly. Allowing ourselves the grace to not finish something immediately gives us the opportunity to avoid procrastination and learn something along the way.

I know when I let go of my need to control everything, my need for things to go EXACTLY according to a plan I might have in my mind, I am always pleasantly surprised by the results I get. My expectations have been known to get me into trouble, because I promise you the scenarios and outcomes I create in my mind are so much more elaborate than I could ever create in real life. It took me a while to realize that I didn’t want to hold myself back and I certainly didn’t want to be unhappy…but once I did, it created a huge amount of freedom and was light a weight being lifted off my shoulders.

I used to think that the pressure I put on myself – the pressure to create success and fulfillment – was what made me successful, but what I have realized after A LONG time is that it’s actually the opposite. I am always going to be driven, motivated, have a love of stepping out of my comfort zone, but it was actually the expectations and the need for perfection that held me back rather than making me better. It’s hard to come to the realization that I was sabotaging my own success, but once I did and I became conscious about my behavior…that’s when the magic started to happen!

Establishing Boundaries

Healthy boundaries are not walls. They are the gates and fences that allow you to enjoy the beauty of your own garden!

Have you ever noticed how easy it is to take everything on, to not delegate, to not set boundaries or to not take care of yourself before taking care of others? As a mother that works full time, has 4 boys and many other commitments, I can tell you that every moment of my time is precious so taking extra things on often means neglecting something or doing something poorly.

Working with Brandon and his coaching program has only made it even more clear to me that if we don’t establish boundaries or take care of ourselves as well, then we are not going to be able to do all the things we need let alone the extra things we often take on.

It is more than about self-care, it is really about setting those limits and not compromising them. I have often been in a position when I have had something planned that is important to me, and something else comes up. I find myself in conflict over the thing I “should” do versus the thing I “want” to do. Obviously, there are certain times when something is urgent or an emergency and that’s not what I am talking here, I am talking about just taking on something when you are only doing it out of obligation or because you feel like someone else can’t handle it.

I used to have a hard time letting things go and letting other people help me, or delegating, but that’s definitely not the case anymore. What I realized (it’s easier to think this for work circumstances, but it definitely applies to life in general) is that my time is best spent doing those things that only I can do. – you know, those things that need you to be the one to handle. For example, I can’t delegate doing the sales that I do, but the paperwork, the backend stuff, those are things I can definitely hand off. At home, we have our kids do certain chores, as I am sure you do, which means that not every single thing about the running of the household is left to Brandon or I.

One of the hardest things to recognize is the fact that our wanting to do everything actually takes away from those we love, because we can’t be there for them 100%. It means we are spreading ourselves so thin that we are unable to be present a lot of the time, especially at those times that are the most important. I’ll admit that while my kids were younger I spent a lot of time doing things myself, not asking for help because I believed I had the perfect way of doing things and didn’t want others to do it another way or I didn’t want them to screw it up. What ended up happening is that I didn’t teach my kids some important lessons, and I ended up being really burned out a lot of the time.

They say that youth is wasted on the young, and I believe it, because with age definitely comes maturity and letting go of control – yes I can admit that I was a little controlling 😉 . I also learned that empowering others to do things actually gives them the chance to step up and learn themselves – which is one of the best gifts we can give someone!

I am still learning, but I definitely feel like the boundaries that I set are pretty healthy – and I am also open to growing and learning more.

Do you have healthy boundaries or do you try to take it all on? Do you feel like if you hand things off to others to do that they won’t do it as well as you?

If you answer yes to the second question, start small…try letting go of just one thing this week. If you feel like you have healthy boundaries, ask yourself this – are you exhausted a lot or do you feel resentment for anyone? If you answer yes to either of those questions, then maybe a little more soul searching is on order 😉

Remember – establishing boundaries is one of the most unselfish things you can do!

Turn Weakness into Strength

Women are never stronger than when they arm themselves with their weaknesses!

As I think back to my childhood I realize that there were so many times that people told me negative things which caused me to feel bad or insecure with myself. In fact, one of the things that I was told when I was growing up by “mean girls” was that I had a huge chin and that it made me look like a witch. I’ll admit that there were some times where I wasn’t sure what they were saying was true or not, and it definitely made me self conscious.

It took me a few years to realize that those that told me those things were probably saying it because they felt insecure or less than confident about themselves. I had a choice at that time to either let what they told me become what I believed and repeated to myself, or to not let it get to me. I was a teenager when it happened, and it was one of the must vulnerable times in my life. My choice was to embrace my features, enjoy who I was and not only carry on but to hold my head up and be proud! I looked at my family and realized that my “strong” chin – which is what I choose to call it – came from my Grandad and he was an AMAZING man! How could I possibly feel bad about it?

As I think back to that time in my life I realize that it was a turning point – it was the time that I made a decision to not let others determine how I feel about myself. It was at that time I promised myself that I would always stand up for myself and be bold! If I could see the people that said mean things about me, I would want to thank them – because if they had not said those things, I wouldn’t have become the strong, determined, powerful and fulfilled woman that I am.

There are definitely people in this life that are going to try and make you feel bad about yourself, who you are, what you look like and very often undermine what you are capable of. I can promise you that NO ONE can make you feel anything. It is your choice to believe what people say or think about you or not.

I have found at times in my life that some people I thought were my friends chose to root against me, to sabotage my success, and quite often be two-faced and almost a wolf in sheep’s clothing. As I become older and more mature I realize that I have no control over how people act or how they think, but I do have control over how it affects me. When someone points out a weakness of mine or roots against me, I choose to not focus on that but rather on being the best me that I can be!

What I have also found is that for all the negativity out there…there is still so much positivity. I choose to focus on that.

Whatever we focus on we end up with more of – so why not think the best about yourself, your talents, your blessings…see what happens!

Fashion Blog

Style Queenie is Your Fashion Blog

“You cannot climb the ladder of success dressed in the costume of failure!”

I grabbed a pair of amazing leggings that I recently purchased because they fit both criteria.  Leggings are a perfect wardrobe addition (if you pick the right pair) because they are comfortable, they can be flattering and of course don’t forget, you want to find a pair that is stylish.  I have seen lots of people walking around in leggings that are either worn out, the wrong color or fabric for someone’s body type (they show off ever bump and curve) and finally the worst thing I think I have ever seen is a pair of “flesh” colored leggings that looks like someone isn’t wearing any pants at all…definitely not the impression you want to make EVER!

The booties have a perfect heel height for lots of walking, shopping and errand running – which is essential for weekends and holidays.  As I have mentioned before, I like to wear shoes with heels a lot more than not, so when I find a pair of boots or shoes that have heels but are still comfortable, I feel like I’ve hit the jackpot!!

What is your ideal street style?  Do you look for comfort first?  Style first?  Or do you just throw on whatever is closest.  The great thing about style and fashion is that it is ever-changing so you don’t ever have to stick with what you have always done, you can change at any time.

Personal Style

Find Your Personal Style

“We don’t see things as they are, we see them as WE are!”

What is your personal style definition? There are many different types of personal style how do you identify your fashion style? We have many personal style examples here at Style Queenie!

Don’t get caught up in wearing things that you think you should wear or what you think others might like, dress for yourself, be yourself, love yourself…let that confidence and certainty in yourself shine through in everything that you do.  Which means picking out your outfit is only a small part of that, but it is something that will set the tone for your entire day.  I know for a fact, when I feel like I look amazing, I am going to perform and react a lot better than if I feel uncertain about my outfit or even my hair.

We all have bad hair days, we all have not so great outfit days, that’s why I always have a few outfits that are back-ups, which means that I can fall back on these outfits on days where I know I need to look my best.  It is something that isn’t thought about much, but it is always a great idea to have a few outfits ready to go in your closet just in case you need them!  Choose things that flatter your body, your coloring and boost your confidence.  I have talked in previous posts how certain colors can evoke certain feelings…there are always colors that you are more in tune with than others, I am drawn to Red and when I want to feel really sassy, powerful and confident, that is always the color I am drawn to first.  Do you have a color that makes you feel most confident?  If you do, make sure you have something in that color that is a standby just in case you need it.

Johnny Cash was always known for wearing all Black – during his era people thought it a little strange.  These days it is not so unusual, but still not something that everyone likes to do, and that is totally fine.  Outfits that incorporate all of the same colors, or closely similar colors are becoming more and more popular – I love the idea of wearing all Beige or all White, to me that is classy.

This is just one more way for you to put your unique personal style stamp on what you wear and how you present yourself…have fun on your personal style journey and don’t be afraid to try new things!

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Fashion Inspiration

Here to Empower Your Fashion Sense

Don’t underestimate yourself by comparing yourself to others.  It’s our differences that make us unique and beautiful.”

What if I told you that you need to forget everything you already know about style and fashion inspiration.  Not because you are doing anything wrong, but because no matter how great you are at putting together outfits and fashion, it is always fun to “clean house” and go back to basics.  We are your fashion inspiration blog with fashion inspiration themes we are not here to tell you who you are but help you find your own fashion inspiration and personal style.

If you truly want to be different, unique, or stand out, the only way you can do that is by taking risks – and the most important thing to remember is that you will probably have people that don’t like what you are wearing BUT if you feel good, then you have accomplished what you set out to do.  Are you confident enough to create your own unique style.  It is easy to see what someone else is wearing and copy it or try to be just like them – but what takes real confidence is to be you…and not care what anyone else says about it.  Now that doesn’t mean you can’t try to recreate outfits that you see in magazines or see a pair of shoes and want to buy them – because magazines and blogs (just like this one) are there to give you ideas and inspire you!

I honestly believe that we were all created to be unique and that our style has the opportunity to show the world just how unique without us having to do or say anything.  As you go out in your own outfit creation, don’t forget to smile and have fun…the more happy and confident you feel, the more others will feel it too!

“Fashion inspiration should be a form of escapism not a form of imprisonment.”

Have you ever wondered which colors suit you best?  Do you sometimes hesitate to wear certain colors because you think they are too bold?

“If you want to have something you’ve never had, then you’ve got to do something you’ve never done!”

Wearing a tight skirt with a tunic or dress over the top is actually a really flattering look and appropriate for most occasions. I feel that it looks professional, especially because I didn’t have to worry about pulling down a shorter dress all day long (especially when sitting down).

Wearing short dresses in the summer can be really tempting but beware of wearing something too short for work – it not only conveys the wrong message to people you are meeting, but it also means you are going to be trying to adjust your hem all day long. Even if when you are standing and it’s not too short, it is a good idea to do the sit test and see how the dress or skirt fits you when you are sitting down.

Doing something unexpected is definitely going to be different for everyone – I tend to try things that can be unusual, but that doesn’t mean that you have to. The key is to make sure you don’t come outside your comfort zone, but you can definitely stretch it!

Fashion Blog Personal Style Fashion Inspiration

Fashion Blog by Style Queenie for all of your Personal Style and Fashion Inspiration. Style Queenie is one of the top fashion blogs for women that can help  you with street fashion and business fashion. Style Queenie is one of the top fashion blogs to follow!