Style Your Own World…

“Don’t let anyone in the world tell you that you can’t be exactly who you are!”

 

The Fashion Industry brings out “new” colors and styles every season, and pretty much they are just a variation from something that has already been around.  Some you might love and want to wear and others you won’t want to be seen dead wearing…so how do you decide what does and doesn’t work for YOU?

Just because a color or style is “in” doesn’t mean that it is something you have to wear, or something that will look good on you.  Trust me, there are some styles that have been around before and I didn’t like them before, so chances are I’m not going to like them this time either.

 

 

I am pretty in tune with what works for me and what doesn’t, but there are still times when I go shopping and think that I would like to try something new.  So, I grab a few things, take them into the changing room, and here’s the important part…once I have them on, I really give myself a close look in the mirror and evaluate myself based on what I know about myself.  If something I’m wearing isn’t in tune with my style, my personality, my lifestyle or my environment, I don’t buy it.  We all come from different walks of life, have different upbringings, different home and work environments, and also we all live in different climates.

Just to put things in perspective, here are a few things I currently avoid and why:

  1. Hot pants or booty shorts – I feel like unless I am on the beach, they are inappropriate for my age and I feel like they make me look “trashy”.
  2. Outfits that show off too much cleavage – again the age thing, but also because I feel like I like to leave more to the imagination.  In my experience, less is more and is much more classy!
  3. Cowboy boots – not that they don’t look great, they are just not in tune with my personality.
  4. Overalls – I wore them at one time but I feel for me, it’s better to leave that in the past 😉
  5. Mom jeans – again this is a style I have worn before, and when I went in and looked at pictures of myself then I wish myself now would have told me NO!!  Mom jeans are great for many body types, however they do have a tendency to accentuate your stomach and make it look larger than it actually is.

Of course the things I avoid may be some things you like, and you should definitely wear what is in YOUR style…

The key to style is being true to yourself!  As you see magazines, blogs, TV, Instagram, Pinterest and many other social channels you will see lots of variations in styles, some of which you may love and others you may hate.  As you look at the different styles, stay in tune with yourself and if you want to learn and expand your style…watch those that resonate with you.  We are all works in progress, just as styles, seasons and colors change, so do our experiences.  Very often our experiences mold the styles we have and who we are.

I make it my goal to learn something new every day, and if you can take one thing from this post, I would say that be open to new possibilities but don’t ever deviate from what feels good for you.  The better you feel about your style and how you look, the more confidence and assurance in yourself you will have!

 


How to Harness your Inner Strength

 

“Strength doesn’t come from what you can do.  It comes from overcoming those things you once thought you couldn’t do!”

 

This weekend I wanted to talk a little about how overcoming challenges is really what makes us who we are. I am sure you have heard this many times before, but have you ever sat down and written down those things that you have gone through (you know, the ones where you weren’t sure if you were actually going to make it or not), with the sole purpose of looking at them in retrospect?  I have found that many, many things don’t make sense to me when I am going through them, but as I look backwards things become clearer, I realize that I am actually stronger and that I have actually made it!

At this point in January there are going to be a lot of resolutions that have already been pushed aside because we’re too busy or life has just happened.  It’s ok, if this is true of you, you’re definitely not alone, and you shouldn’t beat yourself up too much.  But, if you really are looking to make 2018 YOUR year…here’s something you can do to help make that happen…

As I talked about earlier, writing down the amazing things you have survived, worked through and learned from is fabulous, but what if you took it one step further…

What if, instead of just acknowledging those things, what if you really thought about how they made you better.  For example, has one of your experiences taught you patience, are you better equipped to handle “certain types of people”, or even are you more determined and stronger than you have ever been before.  All of these skills are things that can be harnessed to help you be more successful and happy this year.

Whatever your experiences, looking for a silver lining of some way you grew or learned is the best way to grow.

And remember, breathe, you may be having a hard day, but it doesn’t mean that it’s a hard life!

The Power of Positive Thinking

“Failure will never overtake me if my determination to succeed is strong enough”

 

We all have things that we want in this life, personal goals, professional goals and goals for our children or families.  The question is, how badly do we want to achieve these goals?  I have found that the more I want something, the more determined I am to get it, and the more effort I exert.  Of course, a huge part of achieving our goals is tied to our ability to be positive about it.

Have you ever wanted something but all you have done is focus on being upset because other people are doing better, getting frustrated because you haven’t achieved it yet, or even self-sabotaging your efforts because it’s easier to explain away why you didn’t really try to achieve something than it is to put forth the real effort.  In our own lives it can be hard to look introspectively and see where we might be going wrong, but it is absolutely necessary.  I watch my kids, and I notice when they want to quit something what emotions it brings out in me.  I have an easier time talking to them about how falling down or facing obstacles is not the same as failing, it is just a great opportunity for us to become stronger and better.  It’s not as easy when I face those challenges myself…

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Over the past few years I have faced many challenges in my personal life and in my career, but the amazing thing about all those things is that it has taught me so much and made me a much more empathetic and stronger woman.  Even though I am not where I want to be (and to be honest I’m not sure I ever will be exactly where I want), but I do feel like my thoughts are focused in a much more positive direction.  I wouldn’t say I am to the point where I welcome a challenge by saying “bring it on” but I am definitely able to allow myself to be open to the fact that I can learn something, and I am excited about growth opportunities.

 

So, how do you remain positive when all around you is filled with challenges and chaos?

 

Here are some of the ways I have found work for me:

  1. I focus on what good I can see in every situation.  When challenges come my way I always look for the silver lining (what I learned, how I became better at, or even who could I help with this).
  2. Visualization has always been something I have liked to do – not to the point where I am envisioning a house that I want and I have already moved in, but rather I could see myself there, what steps do I need to take to make it happen?
  3. When work is chaotic or overwhelming, I like to think about the things I can control – I like to spend more time doing things that replenish my energy rather than drain it, like spending time with my family.
  4. Finally, I love myself.  No matter what is going on, I focus on loving myself.  When you feel positive about yourself (not just how you look but who you are), other things no longer carry any power.  All is well in your inner world, so the outer world mirrors that!

 

The mind is a powerful thing, why not use it to your advantage?

 

“We can rewire the patterns in our brain with the cognitive behavioral affirmations. It is not just the fluff, woo-woo stuff. Positive thoughts change the way our brain is wired. It really has biochemical, neuro-chemical affects on our brain.”  – Louise Hay

 

 

10 Tips for Feeling Feminine without Giving up Who You Are!

 

 

“A Woman is the full circle.  Within her is the power to create, nurture and transform!”

 

I was raised in a home with only boys…meaning that there was a lot more physical fighting to resolve differences rather than negotiating. I am the oldest, but that didn’t mean I could avoid the fights, but rather I had to become smarter about how I did it.  After about the age of 12 I couldn’t match up physically with my brothers, but I could outsmart them.  I learned some tricks (OK, some of them were dirty) but nevertheless, I not only survived my youth but I actually thrived.

For me being raised in such an environment taught me mental and physical toughness.  I am not a quitter, and I don’t like to appear vulnerable (it was considered a weakness).  Even after telling you all these things, I can tell you that it didn’t take away my feminine side.  In fact, it has taught me to embrace what God gave me, and make the most of it wherever possible.

So, let’s get down to it – what are my tips for feeling feminine and using that femininity to your advantage – because, I believe that we were all given gifts, so why not develop them and use them?

  1. Wear a nice smelling perfume or body lotion.  I know not everyone will agree with this one, but whether you like strong smells or not, when you wear a perfume, that perfume contains chemicals that our bodies react to…and some certain smells are going to make us “feel” good.  It’s a physiological thing – give it a try 🙂
  2. Choose your fabrics wisely – ever noticed that when you are snuggled up on the couch with a blanket, you feel safe, secure and cozy?  Fabrics and how they feel on our skin can also evoke certain feelings. Silk, for example feels luxurious, sexy and feminine, whereas fleece is more about keeping warm. Choose the fabrics that fit the mood you are trying to create!
  3. Take care in how you speak – I have been known to intimidate people because I can be very direct. That is not my intention, however, that is the response that it creates.  So, when I am embracing my femininity I am much more conscious about not only what I say, but mostly how I say it.  Being direct is something that is very controversial, I feel like it is frowned upon when Women do it, however, what I have found is that I can still be direct and concise, but if I do it with a non-aggressive tone, I am much more likely to find positive results.
  4. Wear your favorite colors – certain colors make us look and feel more confident and vibrant.  Bright colors are a great way to show off your personality – not to worry if you are not a fan of bright, bold colors…just add a pop of color in an accessory or lipstick to add that extra dimension to your look.
  5. Go old school – in history Women wore many more dresses and skirts, in fact, they even wore them when they were doing tasks the same as the men such as farm work, etc.  Even if you are not a fan of skirts or dresses, you have to admit that when you see someone wearing a skirt or dress, you notice the legs, the shoes, pretty much the whole look draws you in.  I’m not saying you have to wear a skirt or dress every day (heaven knows I wouldn’t do that) but perhaps you add to your feminine style repertoire you could add them in every once in a while.
  6. Don’t try to too hard – being feminine is something that is subtle yet confident.  Less is so much more, wearing too many ruffles, pleats, patterns or lace can just be too overwhelming and create a really confusing look.
  7. Recognize your strength – femininity is not weak (contrary to popular belief), in fact throughout history many strong Women have shown their feminine side.  When I was younger and much more immature, I thought that in order to get anything done, I had to be aggressive and overpowering. What I have come to realize is that there is so much power in femininity and actually it is much better to embrace your femininity and approach things that way.
  8. Take pride in your appearance – I know there may be a popular belief in Men that we as Women dress for them (should we let them into our secret?)…We all know that confident, self assured Women are themselves and dress present themselves the way that THEY want to!  With that being said, it is important to take pride in your appearance, but for yourself.  Wear your hair in the way that makes you feel great about yourself, and your hygiene should be good.  There’s nothing wrong with wearing something that accentuates your curves, so long as you are doing it for the right reasons 🙂
  9. Be a good listener – I have found that I feel better about myself when I know I am there for people.  Loyalty in friendship is vital to my wellbeing, so when I am THERE for my friends, it makes me feel better as a person.
  10. Be confident – if you do the things listed above, you are most likely going to feel this anyway, so why not show it off.  There is nothing more attractive than a confident Woman.  When I say attractive I don’t just mean in a sexual sense, but also in the way that people will want to be around you.  The better you feel about yourself, the better people will feel about you and hence want to soak up that confidence.

I no longer believe that being feminine is weak – I believe that it is a gift we have been given and we should nurture it.  It was never hard for me to dress in a feminine way, but my actions and behaviors were sometimes contradictory…I am still a very assertive, confident woman, but I am working on presenting myself in softer ways!

 


Satin and Ruffles

“Shine like the whole universe is yours!”

Black Satin Disco Pants (American Apparel):  Available here   Ruffle Sweater (14th & UNION):  Available here Lipstick(MAC):  Available here

Whether you are a clothes junkie, a shopaholic or not, I bet you could still find those 2 or 3 things in your closet that are your favorites…you know those things that you turn to when you are feeling like you want to really step it up!

Today I’m talking about just 2 of mine…satin and ruffles.  Now this doesn’t mean that I don’t love, love, love leather, it just means that today, I’m talking about 2 other things.

You’ve probably seen me post these pants before, and that’s because they are probably my favorite pair of pants…here’s why:

  1. They are shiny 🙂
  2. They are really stretchy but also they really compress everything and hold in all those areas you might not want to show.  The high waist means that you won’t suffer from the problematic “muffin top”.
  3. They are really versatile and work really well to create casual, dressy and sassy outfits.
  4. They wash really well and don’t require any special care.
  5. They are very flattering and make me feel very sexy.

If these things weren’t enough, the cost for these pants is very reasonable – they come in a variety of colors, but Black always has to be my favorite.

 

Next, the ruffle sweater…what I love about this is that it adds a layer of femininity to this more edgy look. Being feminine and not being afraid to show it is one thing that I have come to harness of the past few years.  I have found that the less aggressive (OK, I know, I didn’t say I wasn’t aggressive, just that I liked to be feminine), the more vulnerable and sensitivity I show, the better results I get.  You can get a lot more with sugar than vinegar, so I choose to work on that side of my persona and ruffles definitely help give that perception too…sometimes, a perception is enough to influence someone into thinking something about you – good or bad!

 

Because the outfit was head to toe Black, the pop of color I added was with a MAC lipstick (Cosmo)…

 

I shared my outfit on Instagram here – if you don’t already follow me…check it out!

 


2018 is going to Sparkle

“She who leaves a trail of glitter is never forgotten!”

 

Cheesy caption, but I can tell you this…one thing that came to me while I was contemplating what happened to me in 2017 and how I was going to improve that for 2018, was how I really can affect what happens to me primarily by how I react to it.

Have you ever noticed that when things are going well, EVERYTHING seems to work so much better, there’s kind of a flow and we seem to attract more and more great things into our lives.  It seems almost logical that we would want to continue that kind of attraction…but because we are human, it is not always sustainable to be positive all the time.

 

Knowing that my behavior and attitude can very often determine my results, I made a choice for this year (at least most of it), that I will “sparkle” and be a positive force.  My family tells me all the time that when I am down, angry or just sad, it seems to affect the whole mood in our home.  That’s a lot of pressure, and not something I want put on me…but it’s also quite an amazing ability to know that I can help my family feel more happy, strong and positive!

In keeping with the theme of this post, the sparkly/glitter pants I am wearing are some I bought just before Christmas from H&M and they are really fun (and even better, they’re on sale).  Sparkles are not just for the holidays or special occasions, just like sequins, I think they work whenever you really want them to!  I added a white blouse with a gathered waist (similar one shown below), a long black cardigan and some sock booties. I have also recently fallen in love with some Stila liquid eyeshadow colors that I am wearing in this post.  If you haven’t tried liquid eyeshadow, you definitely should give it a try (I’m definitely sold!)

A great, simple, sparkly outfit – just in time to set you up to have a sparkly 2018 too!

 

 

 

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Style Queenie is Your Fashion Blog

“You cannot climb the ladder of success dressed in the costume of failure!”

I grabbed a pair of amazing leggings that I recently purchased because they fit both criteria.  Leggings are a perfect wardrobe addition (if you pick the right pair) because they are comfortable, they can be flattering and of course don’t forget, you want to find a pair that is stylish.  I have seen lots of people walking around in leggings that are either worn out, the wrong color or fabric for someone’s body type (they show off ever bump and curve) and finally the worst thing I think I have ever seen is a pair of “flesh” colored leggings that looks like someone isn’t wearing any pants at all…definitely not the impression you want to make EVER!

The booties have a perfect heel height for lots of walking, shopping and errand running – which is essential for weekends and holidays.  As I have mentioned before, I like to wear shoes with heels a lot more than not, so when I find a pair of boots or shoes that have heels but are still comfortable, I feel like I’ve hit the jackpot!!

What is your ideal street style?  Do you look for comfort first?  Style first?  Or do you just throw on whatever is closest.  The great thing about style and fashion is that it is ever-changing so you don’t ever have to stick with what you have always done, you can change at any time.

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Personal Style

Find Your Personal Style

“We don’t see things as they are, we see them as WE are!”

What is your personal style definition? There are many different types of personal style how do you identify your fashion style? We have many personal style examples here at Style Queenie!

Don’t get caught up in wearing things that you think you should wear or what you think others might like, dress for yourself, be yourself, love yourself…let that confidence and certainty in yourself shine through in everything that you do.  Which means picking out your outfit is only a small part of that, but it is something that will set the tone for your entire day.  I know for a fact, when I feel like I look amazing, I am going to perform and react a lot better than if I feel uncertain about my outfit or even my hair.

We all have bad hair days, we all have not so great outfit days, that’s why I always have a few outfits that are back-ups, which means that I can fall back on these outfits on days where I know I need to look my best.  It is something that isn’t thought about much, but it is always a great idea to have a few outfits ready to go in your closet just in case you need them!  Choose things that flatter your body, your coloring and boost your confidence.  I have talked in previous posts how certain colors can evoke certain feelings…there are always colors that you are more in tune with than others, I am drawn to Red and when I want to feel really sassy, powerful and confident, that is always the color I am drawn to first.  Do you have a color that makes you feel most confident?  If you do, make sure you have something in that color that is a standby just in case you need it.

Johnny Cash was always known for wearing all Black – during his era people thought it a little strange.  These days it is not so unusual, but still not something that everyone likes to do, and that is totally fine.  Outfits that incorporate all of the same colors, or closely similar colors are becoming more and more popular – I love the idea of wearing all Beige or all White, to me that is classy.

This is just one more way for you to put your unique personal style stamp on what you wear and how you present yourself…have fun on your personal style journey and don’t be afraid to try new things!

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Fashion Inspiration

Here to Empower Your Fashion Sense

Don’t underestimate yourself by comparing yourself to others.  It’s our differences that make us unique and beautiful.”

What if I told you that you need to forget everything you already know about style and fashion inspiration.  Not because you are doing anything wrong, but because no matter how great you are at putting together outfits and fashion, it is always fun to “clean house” and go back to basics.  We are your fashion inspiration blog with fashion inspiration themes we are not here to tell you who you are but help you find your own fashion inspiration and personal style.

If you truly want to be different, unique, or stand out, the only way you can do that is by taking risks – and the most important thing to remember is that you will probably have people that don’t like what you are wearing BUT if you feel good, then you have accomplished what you set out to do.  Are you confident enough to create your own unique style.  It is easy to see what someone else is wearing and copy it or try to be just like them – but what takes real confidence is to be you…and not care what anyone else says about it.  Now that doesn’t mean you can’t try to recreate outfits that you see in magazines or see a pair of shoes and want to buy them – because magazines and blogs (just like this one) are there to give you ideas and inspire you!

I honestly believe that we were all created to be unique and that our style has the opportunity to show the world just how unique without us having to do or say anything.  As you go out in your own outfit creation, don’t forget to smile and have fun…the more happy and confident you feel, the more others will feel it too!

“Fashion inspiration should be a form of escapism not a form of imprisonment.”

Have you ever wondered which colors suit you best?  Do you sometimes hesitate to wear certain colors because you think they are too bold?

“If you want to have something you’ve never had, then you’ve got to do something you’ve never done!”

Wearing a tight skirt with a tunic or dress over the top is actually a really flattering look and appropriate for most occasions. I feel that it looks professional, especially because I didn’t have to worry about pulling down a shorter dress all day long (especially when sitting down).

Wearing short dresses in the summer can be really tempting but beware of wearing something too short for work – it not only conveys the wrong message to people you are meeting, but it also means you are going to be trying to adjust your hem all day long. Even if when you are standing and it’s not too short, it is a good idea to do the sit test and see how the dress or skirt fits you when you are sitting down.

Doing something unexpected is definitely going to be different for everyone – I tend to try things that can be unusual, but that doesn’t mean that you have to. The key is to make sure you don’t come outside your comfort zone, but you can definitely stretch it!

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